Circle of Trust

Every time I come to an F3 workout, I’m thinking of three different men.

• There’s the man I was in the past.
• There’s the man I am today.
• And there’s the man I want to be in the future.

When I started back in July of last year, I was in the worst shape of my life. So, while the workouts were hard—are still hard—they were harder than they would’ve been years ago. And they were more dangerous than ever. In fact, I kept getting hurt and I couldn’t keep up.

In the beginning, I was really frustrated. I kept thinking “I used to work out all the time. This shouldn’t be so hard.” “I played football, basketball, and baseball at the college level. I should be able to do this.” “I ran the Chicago Marathon, I should be able to run a half mile without stopping.” I wasn’t used to being the person in the group who was in the worst shape.

I was mad at myself.

Maybe you can relate.

But, through F3, I learned that I need to let go of the man I was in the past. I’m not him anymore. Expecting myself to be him is dragging me down.

To this day, every time I come out here, I struggle. I’m overweight. I’m slow. I have a bad back. I have arthritis in my ribs. I have a hernia. I have a bad right shoulder and a bad left elbow.

I’m struggling, but I’m trying.

And, through F3, I’ve learned that I need to accept the man I am today–everyday. I need to focus on what I can control–and that’s coming out, listening to my body, and modifying so I can keep coming out. It took a long time to convince myself that all of you are not judging me if I need to modify, if I can’t do what you can do, or if I’m the last one in line.

At the same time, while I know that trying to do too much can actually end up causing an injury or setting me back, I also know that not pushing myself to do just a little bit more isn’t going to get me where I want to be. So I’ll ask you to keep pushing from alongside me. And I can’t thank all of the 6s for never leaving me behind along the way.

In the future, the man I want to be is there for my family, giving back to my community, and here for all of you. I believe that every person is influenced by the 5-10 people we spend the most time with.

So, I’m not there yet. But, I’ll get there. And along the way, I plan to spend my time with all of you.